No Boys Allowed!

Warning! This is a girls post! Talking about inside girl parts that boys don't need to know about. If you are a boy, do not read the rest of this post!

You were warned...

I had a Dr appt yesterday for my HPV checkup. Dr. R is my doctor, but Dr. H came in for a consult. Dr. R was ready to do a colposcopy (take little chunks out of my cervix with a really big, ugly slide cutting tool). When she swabbed the area, she could find no displasia (sp?). Get that?! No bad cell growth!

Believe me, she poked and prodded. Searched high and low. Couldn't find anything. So she just did a normal PAP and sent it off to the lab. We'll see when the results come back if the virus is gone (thanks to the LEEP) or just sleeping for now. Even if it's just hiding out in there somewhere, it could be years before I get any more abnormal cells pop up. Of course, it could also show up next month, but we're trying to be positive here...

So, for now all is well. I have to go for check ups every 6 months instead of every 2 years, but that's better than a hysterectomy!!

Baby Fuzzies

As a mom, there are some memories that are crystal clear, while others are fuzzy from sleep deprivation. For me, one of those crystal memories is stroking each of the childrens heads when they were infants.

Hannah always had silky fine, slick hair. Like when you forget to rinse out conditioner. She still has fine, soft hair. Nathan's was coarser. I could feel the microscopic bumps catch under my fingertips. Now we have Leah, and her hair feels much the way Nathan's did.

I love the feel of a soft, warm babys head. The feel of that spark of life just under the surface. The smell of baby shampoo and fabric softener.

I have HPV. My OB/GYN keeps taking chunks out of my cervix, but the abnormal cell growth keeps coming back. She's waiting for me to be done having children so she can just take the whole darn thing out.

And I am not ready to make that decision. Especially when I sit in the wee morning hours stroking my babys head.